Tomorrow is the end

(last night at Shanghai Lil's)

In the afternoon tomorrow is my last exam, which gives me time now to reflect on the year. Its been long but we're at the end for better or worse. I think on March and all that occurred with Sebs father, the schoolwork, the kids, Seb losing his job and spending the night in hospital, Mums operation, Jessies visit new friendships and new knowledge and its been really really full on. Despite 2009 being a year I know some people would rather forget, in spite of the crap bits I won't look back at 2009 negatively.

University has taken me on a journey of learning, and realising an avenue for latent passions, getting to know myself better in all my disparate parts till I can come together as a whole. Exploring my hybridity through Sue's media paper and settling my academic areas of interest on media, social justice, identity, and Maori politics inside my two majors has allowed me to to channel my thinking. Louise Humpage the undergrad adviser for Sociology is offering a really interesting paper on New Zealand and concepts of identity in 2011 which she ran by me and Letitia at the post grad luncheon, she was pleased to see that I was very interested in participating, in the event I take post graduate studies in Sociology.

When I started this degree I was a psychology major, and took Sociology by accident more than design. I didn't understand politics, shied away from it, and was bent on getting involved in mental health. What I planted is not what I am eventually sowing, this accidental pathway to learning leading me to find the place I really feel comfortable, the specifics of my areas of interest being quite different to most of my classmates who are Law/BA Maori conjoint students, or BA English, Geo, History, or Philosphy majors. Letitia and Derrick are my only Sociol/Politics friends and Im the only one out of the 3 of us also doing Maori studies. Spending more time in Maori studies has allowed me the chance to meet more hybrids like myself, who run along a spectrum of identity. I've also got to know them more as people, and have enjoyed being in an environment which cuts across the stereotype of Maori as below the bar, instead being in the company of motivated passionate people who are driven by different things, not the accolades of individualism, but some kind of communal drive to care for their tamariki and their whanau, be successful, make a difference, empower Maoridom in their own small way.

So tomorrow I get to say farewell to this step in the chain and start thinking about what happens next.

Last night was the Tempo dance awards at the Birdcage, Gabby invited us to come because 'Hapu' her solo piece was up for 4 awards, one of which was recognising Sebs participation in the making of the short film. They didn't get that one, by deservedly so, Gabby won the most inspiring dance award, something that was  so fitting given Gabby was 7 1/2 months pregnant and danced every night for a week. I wish it had been filmed because her big fat belly defied gravity. In 14 days Gabby will (hopefully) give birth to their daughter, they revealed her name last night to be Holiday-Rose which I reacted to abit weirdly ( I needed time to process!) but now I see it written and I know why I think its perfect. If she is anything like her brother Nureyev shes going to be lots of fun.